Pick Me Up

Life isn't always full of roses. 

I sometimes have to be reminded of that.

The funny stories? The awkward moments?

Sometimes, they wear on me. 

I love telling the stories. I love laughing about everything that happens.

Because either I'm going to laugh or I'm going to cry.

Today was a crying day.

There are sometimes where I wish as hard as I can on stars and dreams and wishes and hope that they come true. And then, I pull out my depressing song playlist (maybe some friends have made fun of me for having such a playlist...) and I listen and I cry and think that every painful song speaks to my existence. Is there someone out there who will love me? And why do I keep putting myself through this torture? It would just be easy to not deal with dating anymore, I tell myself. 

My friend is in Russia right now. Every Monday morning, I wake up and have a little email from her. This week, her email has been on my mind. Here is a part (hopefully she doesn't mind that I'm posting it):

"'Develop the habit of doing unpleasant things quickly and without hesitation. If you are going to jump in cold water, jump in the cold water. If you need to get up, get right out of bed. Do the dishes that need doing. Finish the hard jobs at work while everyone else is coming up with excuses to get out of them.

"'Like with applying force, all of your agonizing should be concentrated on deciding if you should do something. Once that is decided, do it. Quickly, efficiently, and without hesitation.

"'The ability to do this amazes mere mortals. It almost qualifies as a super power.'

"So there it is... When your alarm goes off, get out of bed. When you have to study for a test, study. When the dishes need to be done, just do 'em. When we practice this in our lives, we are training to be super heroes. I think we should start working on our super hero titles and costumes."

I'm trying to decide what my super hero name will be:

Over-analytical girl

 Bookworm

Trivia Queen

But in the meantime, I'm going to just keep plugging through and doing the hard things.

Saturday Stories: Stud Finder

I used to work with a boss who was only two months older than me. 

In fact, most of our team is right around the same age (sometimes in maturity age, but mostly in real time age). 

Our meetings were often filled with humor, loads of sarcasm, and a pinch of wit.

One of my favorite co-workers, Mike, had recently purchased a house. He mentioned that he needed to go purchase a stud finder to secure a bookcase to the wall.

Boss Jake pulled out some of that wit and said, "Emery will need to borrow that after you're done with it."

We all looked at him as if he had spoken a foreign language. Jake quickly added, "Emery may need some help finding a real stud since she's been having some trouble in that area..."

Oh, good one, Jake. A STUD finder.

Although, about now, I'm wishing that such a thing really existed.

Maybe then, I wouldn't have to spend 15 minutes of my work-day looking over comics drawn by a young man who is watching me read these comics and judging my reactions. 

But I supposed that's a story for another Saturday...

Tech Thursday: Making It Pretty

So... maybe it's bad to start my week off having to do three blog posts. Apparently, I can't get my act together on Tuesday to do these posts. So, we're going to switch to Thursdays...

Today's topic: Making it Pretty.

I'll admit that I'm on the Internet a good portion of my day. I'm on my computer for work and every once in awhile, I surf around. I'll hit up my favorite social media sites: Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest. And the other place I'll go is Google Reader. It's my go-to tool for RSS feeds.

I follow a lot of blogs. Friends' blogs, but also blogs of people I've never even met. Photography blogs or people's blogs where they tell their story. I find it fascinating that we can connect on a level just through blogs. 

But I'll be honest, the first thing that I look for when I go to a new blog is the layout. Is it inviting? Or is it cluttered with sponsors and music (I loathe automatic music on blogs) and slideshows that slow down the loading time? If it takes forever for the blog to load, I'm already turned off. 

After the design has drawn me in, I look at the writing. Do I like the writing? Does it speak to me? Sometimes I'll follow a blog, only to realize a few months later that I hardly ever read that blog anymore. And so I'll unfollow. Maybe I really just liked that one post. It's hard to say. But I want to at least give it a chance. 

Here are three blogs that I follow with Google Reader:

Elle Apparell

I love the clean look, the straight lines of Leanne Barlow's blog.

It's the color of the pictures that draws your eyes in.

Plus, I'm trying to home my sewing skills, so this is a perfect blog for that.

But she's added "tutorials" to the top menu, and then pictures on the side that link to the specific tutorials. She makes it so easy to find stuff.

Story of My Life

Again, the pictures make this blog, but I think Jenni does a great job with the sponsors.

The sponsor links don't clutter the rest of the page. They're organized and my eyes are still drawn to the blog post. Plus, her writing is beautiful (and so is she).

A Little Sussy

If there was one blogger I wish I could be like, it's Nicole Hill Gerulat. 

The photos are stunning (she is a professional photographer after all) and I love how she uses the photos to say everything.

The design is super clean. Yep. I aspire to do this.

Those are just some blogs that I follow because they first drew me in with the design and then the content really solidified my need to read. 

As we're building websites and such, we need to make sure that the design is inviting (I really need to take my own advice on this), that it's easy to load, and that our content is top-notch. Make it a pretty place to stay (or ruggedly handsome... I don't know what the non-pretty term will be. It's been too long since I lived with my brothers...).

What are your favorite blogs to read/visit and why? What makes you want to "follow" a blog?

Note: This post is not a plug for these other blogs. I really do read and love them and admire their design. I didn't ask them if I could link to their blog or tell them that I was going to do this. They have no affiliation with me or my blog.

Wednesday Letters: Rising From the Ashes

Dear Batman Fans,

It was a glorious show.

I felt it in my bones. The chills. The emotions. The heightened sense of fear.

Two hours and 45 minutes? That's a long movie.

It didn't feel like it. 

And I want to go again. 

Regards,

Emery

The World is Filled With Mondays

Some time ago, I read somewhere to think of Monday as the bright and shining part of the week. You TGIM, basically, because it means the beginning. Fresh start, blah blah blah.

My life is often a roller coaster of loop-di-loos, highs and lows, fast speeds (when tears are coming out of my eyes from how fast things are going) and slow climbs. Last year, I was grateful for Mondays because it meant that I could go back to work, back to my routine, back to my friends who were at work. Because my life outside of work was a mess and was awful.

But this morning, it took a lot out of me to get out of bed. I'm almost grateful that tomorrow I get work off. All to celebrate the pioneers who settled this state I live in. I plan to celebrate with sleeping in, lifting weights, a walk, and pool time. Maybe a trip to Target.

However, as I laid in bed and thought that maybe it would be a fantastic idea to skip Jillian Michaels this morning and sleep a little longer, I remember that one small piece of advice I read a couple of years ago. TGIM... Thank God It's Monday.

So I did.

And now I'm at work.

And waiting for 4:15 to roll around so I can skip off to the outlets on my way to my brother's house. 

Tomorrow will be better.

And maybe I'll return to my routine that I kept up for all of two weeks. 

Maybe we'll start blogging about some Jillian Michaels stuff 

(because let's be honest here... 

I only started looking good after I started doing her workouts).

How was your weekend?

Saturday Stories: The Set Up

It has certainly been a week.

I'm glad it's Saturday.

And that means, I get to remember a good story.

So, I have only been set up three times in my life. I wonder if it's I'm so odd that my friends fear setting me up because they may lose guy friends. Or maybe we really don't have that many guy friends.

Still, a friend offered to set me up on a date. She talked the guy up for some time before we actually could schedule a date. The week came, and he called me up. We had an awkward conversation on the phone and then later in the week he sent me a text and just said to dress comfortably. 

I went to my friend's house where I met up with her and her fiancé. My date arrived and off we went to go bowling and have pizza. I usually love bowling, but it was awkward to go bowl and come back and be in the middle of a conversation where I had no idea what they were talking about. So the conversation seemed to always be changing directions. He was nice though.

The ride back to my friend's house, though, was awkward. He decided that he didn't want to take the freeway. We were going to take the side streets. I tried to not panic, but I really don't like taking side streets. I want to know where I'm going. It's a control issue. But he seemed nice enough so I shouldn't have been too frightened.

He dropped me off next to my car (he never got out of the car to open the door for me and had pulled up next to my car) and then drove off because he needed to get to work for the night. 

There wasn't a second date.

But don't worry, my friend did tell this guy's mom that I was perfect for him. When I met his mom at my friend's bridal shower, she seemed very interested in being buddy-buddy with me. That was the best part. I didn't have the heart to tell her that it probably wasn't going to happen. 

So, noted: Don't talk to the mom until there's at least been three dates...

Wednesday Letters: Creators of Gilmore Girls

Dear Creators of Gilmore Girls,

Thank you.

Somehow, I didn't discover your TV show until it was in its last season. But I bought the complete series.

And every year I have a marathon. 

I remind myself that maybe I am a small-town girl, even if I grew up in a suburb of a coastal city. And maybe I do dream of a boy wearing a backwards baseball cap who comes and rescues me. 

And maybe I dream big dreams of writing for the New York Times (even if my time to make such choices has long since passed). 

So, thanks for letting me relive those moments. And enjoy Stars Hollow once again.

love,

Emery

Hard Things

I believe in doing hard things. 

Okay... that's a lie. The honest statement is usually:

I believe in doing things that I'm good at.

But this year is a new year for me. 

This year, I wanted to try new things. Live life a little more.

I want that first statement to be the honest truth.

I want to believe in doing hard things.

Eight years ago, this past Saturday, I did something incredibly hard for me. 

For eighteen months, I lived abroad in a country where I didn't speak the language and taught people about God and my religion. 

There were times when I said it was too hard.

I don't think about those times very often. I think about the happy times.

But it was still hard.

So, on Saturday, I took a chance and decided to do something hard.

And for the world, 3.1 miles probably seems like nothing.

But for me... it was a battle. 

Mile 1 was all up hill.

Mile 2 was pretty flat.

Mile 3 was the home stretch and mostly down hill.

My iPod played various songs from Maroon 5, Carly Rae Jepson, and songs from Glee, and I just kept running. I wanted to finish.

Finish, I did.

I certainly wasn't very fast. 

38:48; pace of 12:31/mile.

But I'm happy.

(Can't you tell from my bright red face?)

So, maybe I do believe in doing hard things...

Maybe I'll keep doing them.

Or maybe I'll take a break from hard things. And relax.

(Oh yes... and the secret is to run the race with a friend. Best motivator).

Interruptions: Kismet (noun)

It means fate, destiny, or a pre-destined course of events.

Remember my encounter with a certain young man (CYM for future reference) a few weeks ago?

What if I told you that CYM now works with my old team (I got a new assignment) and now is at our building every day? And also has to temporarily share my office with me?

Kismet.

It's been a good week. 

Wednesday Letters: Future Daughters

Dearest future daughters:

You are welcome to play dress up. I'll help you transform a blanket into a ball gown. And we'll deck out with necklaces and crowns and say we're princesses.

At night, I'll tell you fairy tales. The stories about your great-grandparents, and your grandparents, and maybe some of your aunts and uncles. And I'll tell you my fairy tale story. 

And as you get older, I'll tell you the other stories. The stories of heartbreak and the stories of humor. 

And I'll remind you that your fairy tale will happen too. Because I've held onto that belief for a long time. It will happen to you.

Love,

Emery

You're studying WHAT?!

I rarely like to broadcast that I'm still in school. That I'm getting a masters degree. It doesn't come up in normal conversation unless I bring it up and I just choose to not bring it up.

And the reason I choose to not bring it up because the response after I tell them I'm studying library and information science, the response is one of three:

"And you find that interesting?"

"So... you want to be a librarian?"

"You have to get a masters for that?"

Yep. It's a winner of a degree. But the more I've studied, the more interested I've become in the possibilities that exist. 

So, let me give you the rundown about library and information science.

It's the science of organizing information. 

I know. It sounds boring already. One manager heard that and immediately thought that I would make the perfect secretary then... I mean, I love to organize, right?

But it's more about logically organizing information to make it accessible to people. 

I'll admit, at first, my plan was to become a young adult librarian so that I could read all of the cool books before they hit the shelves. But if you just love reading, you should not become a librarian. First rule. 

So, I've tried to expand my understanding. I took a Web Technology and Tools class and my final project was to create an entire website. It was pretty basic. One frame. Kind of geeky. I need to take a design like Adobe Illustrator class or something so that I can learn how to make things look pretty.

I've taken a cataloging class. Fall semester, I'm signed up for a Digital Copyright class (I'm hoping it will give me a leg up in my current job situation to maybe go toe-to-toe with a couple of guys and finally win an argument. Maybe I should've been a lawyer...) And I'm hoping to take a few social media focused courses before my time is up.

So you see, really, it's a bigger thing with lots of direction. I don't have to be a librarian. It's only taken me two years of study to figure that one out.

But I am glad that I had this summer off. A little disappointed because I was really excited about the class I was going to take.

Let's be honest though—I really do love reading. And sitting by the pool reading? That's the best way to spend one's summer.

The Beach Boys And I Traded Venues...

It's true.

They were in Utah.

I was in California.

I think I got the better deal.

No stories today. I'm still trying to get back into the rhythm of my real life. But I do want to leave you with a few pictures that might explain why I'm currently very homesick to be anywhere but where I am.

See what I mean? Six days of this. Beach time. Sunshine. And little children.

I'll recover soon. I'm sure of it. I'm hoping for it.

"What are you waiting for?" "A red light?"

So, normally today would be Tech Tuesday.

But I'm on vacation. In California. My hometown.

We've eaten pancakes that are bigger than our heads (totally recommend the Potato Shack to anyone who is coming to Encinitas.)

I've played with my sweet six month old niece. I'm in love with her. And her smile.

This is her smile. And I can't wait to get a better phone to take better pictures.

And we've played at the beach.

And then, after shopping last night, we had a little car trouble. The title comes from my dad having stopped at the stop sign and waiting for the "red light". He was apparently a little tired. Laughed for awhile with that one.

But yes. Today is supposed to be Tech Tuesday. Instead, I'm giving you a reading assignment. Please find the book, "Content Rules" and start reading. I've checked it out from the library and now I'm about ready to go purchase it. It's a fantastic read about creating good content. Especially for those who are just starting in the social media/Internet scene with their business. It's definitely generated some serious thoughts that need to be discussed with my cohorts. 

So, read up. And let me know what good reads you've found. And I'll see you tomorrow.

The Parable of Jurassic Park

Have you ever watched Jurassic Park? The dinosaurs are fed by mechanical devices. The stick the cow right in the midst of the velociraptors, they attack and eat to the cow. They're good little hunters, don't get me wrong. But because someone is providing the food, they get lazy. 

My roommate compared this to guys on the single scene. We live in an age whe women have achieved some idea of equality. We can have jobs, be directors (not just secretaries anymore), and do all these amazing things. And sometimes, we act that way in a dating world. We say, "I go toe-to-toe with this type of guy at work, I totally can make him like me" or whatever. 

Or we are so focused on winning or getting into a relationship because that's what you're supposed to do, that we start throwing ourselves, or at least stop being a challenge.

I don't mean being an obnoxious challenge where we string guys along.But we agree to go on dates when they call Friday morning to see if we can go out that night. Sure, we may not have plans, but why are we giving them this chance?

Yes, it's not fun to have to sit back and wait for him to step up to the plate. So, here are a few suggestions that I have:

1. Plan a girls' night.

Play games. Do your thing. Paint your nails. Enjoy this time with the girls. Go out to dinner. Really? How often do you enjoy your time with your girlfriends? 

2. If you really want him to ask you out, next time you're talking to him suggest an activity that you should do together "sometime".

If he doesn't respond or doesn't take the blatant hint—move on. Forget about him. If he doesn't make the effort, he's not worth it. 

This rule goes for most anything. Encourage him, give him an open door, but if he doesn't take action there's no reason for you to do so. Maybe you'll disagree with me and tell me to ask a guy out once in awhile. I have found that it never works well. 

3. Enjoy what you do.

This has been difficult for me lately. Trying to accept the fact that I'm reaching a milestone in seven months and I'm still single unnerves me slightly. I'm learning to make plans based on my more immediate needs. But focus on the good things in your life. It's okay to have moments of sadness. But try hard not to worry about those.

So, remember, ladies—don't be like the keepers at Jurassic Park who just throw food out for those raptors. Let them be who they really are—hunters. Just be ready to open the door for them.

Saturday Stories: A Day Late And A...

This post is a day and a half later than planned.

That's what happens when you go on a vacation and Saturday is the day that everyone plans to arrive. 

You spend the day preparing for the arrivals by going grocery shopping and then when they arrive you go swimming for the first time and just relax (and maybe fall asleep while laying out in the sun just because you can).

But still. 

So, this week's story happened on Friday. 

I had gone to see one of my managers to discuss some items. As I went out to take the elevator back up to my floor, a young man was standing there also waiting for the elevator. He asked me if I worked in the department. I responded in the affirmative. 

He told me his name. I gave him mine. He was very polite and nerdy looking in his suit with his laptop bag. Maybe I thought the nerdy was kind of cute.

He asked how long I had been with the department. I told him a year and a half. He asked what I did. I told him. He knew right away. He worked in the department but at the office down south. He explained that he didn't know anyone who worked in the main building. I had a gut feeling that the ride up to my floor might be fortuitous. 

Not so.

We happened to get on the elevator with some co-workers from the department I had worked in before my current assignment. They know me as being sarcastic and of quick wit. Unfortunately, that meant that the ride up 4 floors was spent teasing me. Poor guy never got the chance.

Maybe he'll look me up in the work directory. There are only four or five women with my first name. And our pictures are up with them. 

If not, it's just nice that someone noticed me for a second. And it only adds fuel to co-worker Dave's conclusion that I'm a nerd at heart (don't tell him he's right though. He doesn't need to hear that anymore than he already does).