Saturday Stories: The Black Eye Incident

Not too long ago, I was healing a broken heart.

My friend was trying to get me out and back in the dating game. Because that's apparently how to fix a broken heart. 

So she lined me up on a date with some boy she knew and planned on coming along on a double date to help me with my awkward epic shyness. 

He didn't pick me up. I met him at a park. We decided to go and play Frisbee Golf. Frolf, if you will. So we drove to Walmart, picked some frisbees and then drove around for an hour trying to find a Frisbee Golf course. We failed and returned to the park where I had parked my car. We then basically made our own course as we wandered around the park using different objects as the "hole". My date and I talked a bit, but really there wasn't much chemistry. 

We decided it was probably time for some dinner so we started back to the car. In the middle of the park was a giant steep hill. We walked to the top of it and my friend decided it would be fun to roll down the hill. She was 20. Twenty year olds can do that. 

So she rolls down the hill. 

Her date rolls down the hill. 

My date looks at me. 

My thought process was something like: 

I'm 28 years old. 

I don't roll down hills.

But I don't want to be the killjoy.

This date isn't leading to a second date.

But maybe he'll see that you're spontaneous and fun.

Do you want there to be a second date?

Well... no... maybe?

Just do it.

So I did. I rolled down the hill.

Except I forgot to take off my glasses.

The glasses hit my nose quite hard and flew off. 

At the bottom of the hill I laid there feeling extremely old. 

That's when I felt my nose running. It had been slightly cold.

When I pulled my hand away, there was blood.

I had given myself a bloody nose. 

And I could feel the bruise starting to form on my nose.

It was awful.

There was not a second date.

There wasn't even a follow up acknowledgement.

I was okay with that.

I may be the worst first dater ever.